Why One Woman Identifies With the Midlife Crisis Man

I faced my midlife problem at the age of 33 and over the next 15 years I changed from entrepreneur to college student to assistant and homeowner to entrepreneur to unemployed to authorized sales of unemployed employees to NOW. A very roundabout route! Yes, the plan helps, but sometimes meeting our future takes a toll on faith. I started a blog as a heretic, and I wanted a career change. Did I really know that there were thousands of men who could benefit from my experience in the trenches? No, but my senses told me that most men wished they were better understood. Men are often misunderstood, do not support their decisions, and are not recognized for their role in the family and the community. When I “retired” from advertising, I thought, 'Now I know why men die after retirement.' I lost my morning. Although closing my business was a sensible decision, I was associated with a fast-paced, competitive world that lost my sense of self. Five years later, I started a small publishing company and thought I had found my calling. That business was canceled at a time when there were so many exposures in the country. It took me four years and a mental illness to recover. But sometimes what we see as “collapse” is actually “success.” What I have learned is that we cannot control anything. I have no control over anything. Think a little about Chinese handcuffs; when you are struggling, they will bind you fast. The same can be said of the mental and emotional anguish that results from the decline. When we try to control our life, we will continue to make noise. Instead, consider the possibility that by adapting to a new and changing reality, clarity and direction are yours to ask. When I grabbed hold of the handcuffs, they bound me in an old way. I could not let go, until my circumstances forced me to do so. Men are not easy in this world. Protecting and providing for your family, day in and day out, does not get much media attention. How do you protect your family from invisibility? How does it provide when the “old” economy withdrew from its promises? Or is it stealing your financial future? Do you press and grind each day without end? I know how you feel (I've been traumatized by the events of the automotive industry.) I've felt that way myself (mom's constant worries.) And I've found that adherence doesn't. Function. Today is the only day we have. I wasted all that energy and emotions worrying about my future, but I can't say it was wasted. I saw things happen in their own time. Lao Tau, wrote, “Waiting is not an empty hope.” There is such a thing as time. I had to get more emotional tools and mental weapons to prepare for the unexpected battles. I forgot who I was for a while, but I never stopped fighting and preparing myself. The day comes in the life of everyone you want called the "dark night of the soul." We can never know exactly how long that day will last. He finally appears, and you can say with confidence and clarity: I know who I am! That knowledge can give you the courage to do something. Let that be your anchor, not a public “right” or an expectation of others. Feed and protect your family with all your strength. That's all it takes.