November 19 is International Men’s Day and it is celebrated on 19th November every year, with around 80 countries worldwide getting involved. Although Friday 19 November 2021 is the day, many people will hold their activities and celebrations before or after the main event.
So what can International Men’s Day achieve?:
- Highlight some of the social issues that men and boys face
- Make a difference for the men and boys in your community
- Celebrate men and boys in all their diversity
- Have some serious fun
But it wouldn’t be IMD without backlash. “every day is men’s day” is the most common claim by some groups of people. This attitude is exactly why we need IMD and International Women’s Day. IWD is universally applauded and marketers use it to manipulate women into buying stuff they don’t need, made by women working under slave conditions, women living on or near poverty, as the greenhouse gas emissions generated for that little trinket burn the planet for the next generation.
IWD is also the day where we hear stories of stunning, brave, bold, strong, fearless, independent, capable, respectful, empowered, inspiring, courageous, passionate, brilliant, gorgeous, incredible, supporting women doing stuff. We hear people voicing women’s issues and concerns and politicians usually take advantage of the day by announcing some funding for <insert random issue> to show how “they understand women”. It usually goes on for a week or so and by the end of it, if you haven’t supported it, then you are an evil person supporting to patriarchy.
But the common theme here is empathy. Society is expected to sit up and listen to people voicing and raising issues that affect women, and society is expected to listen to the forgotten stories of women who were never recognised for their efforts. Stories of evil men stealing the work of women are always aired on IWD.
So why is there such a backlash against IMD? Why is there so much hatred about this day? I have scrolled through social media surrounding IMD over a number of years and the common complaint raised by feminists is “men are fighting for rights they always had”. Well not really, IMD has always been about men talking about men’s issues. Issues not affecting them, NOW. What is so wrong about men talking about issues that they see affecting them? You wouldn’t go to a therapist and when she says “what’s troubling you today?” and as soon as the (male) patient says “I’m worried about…” she cuts you off and responds with “you have nothing to complain about”.
Humans are never happy unless we are complaining.
Feminists want men to respect IWD, and so feminists must respect IMD. If you care about women’s rights, you care about men’s rights, and vice versa. Despite the hopes and dreams of a misandrist feminist Utopia of a lesbian paradise where men are milked to provide the means for making babies, men and women live together in a society. Men must listen to women’s issues and women must listen to men’s issues.
If you are so selfish and greedy that you fail to have the empathy to listen to the other gender’s issue, then you do not deserve to have your own day.
This November 19th, if you consider yourself a feminist, a true feminist and not a misandrist, listen with both ears to men raising the concerns that worry them, so that next IWD, you can raise your concerns knowing that they can listen to you with both ears. If you put fingers in your ears like a 5 year old and make noises to drone out men’s voices, don’t expect to get any respect back.
That is why Feminists must support International Men’s Day.
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