What is sexual health so? We tend to learn about sexual health in quite simplistic terms, and we're taught that if we prevent pregnancy and we don't contract or spread Sexually Transmitted Infection (STIs), and as long as we're asking for consent, then we'll be sexually healthy individuals, and while those things are essential they don't tell the whole story of what it takes to be a truly thriving sexually healthy individual
I know that that is quite a lot in one definition, so I’m going to break this down for you to look at each definition or element of sexual health and then share some different examples. I just want to clarify that when I talk about the elements of sexual health, I’m really referring to what I believe are the pillars of sexual health and that to be truly thriving to be a thriving sexually healthy individual then you need to intentionally strengthen each pillar of sexual health or the elements here that I’m going to explain to you so just to reiterate the elements are confidence and security in your sexuality and identity.
Healthy and positive sexual experiences nurturing enriching relationships, exercising autonomy over sexuality and body, and keeping the body free of infection and working at an optimal level. Let's break those down, starting with confidence and security in your sexuality and identity. Hence, what this looks like or may look like is you feel comfortable and free just being you, whether you know different aspects of your identity or, more specifically, your sexuality and your sexual identity. Having a deep understanding of what you need and want and having the confidence and language to express yourself.
It's essential to understand that your needs and wants will change throughout life, and that is totally normal, but we want to make sure that we're taking time to reflect and really understand our changing needs. Our needs and wants are throughout life, and then being able to express those healthy and positive sexual experiences refers to the ability to engage in sexual experiences either by yourself or partnered that are healthy and pleasurable not only in the moment but also leave you feeling positive afterward.
Sexual experiences can be really confusing because, on the one hand, they can be pleasurable. Still, on the other hand, maybe they'll leave you feeling emotionally hurt, or they're emotionally confusing. You know, even though it's pleasurable at the moment afterward, you're questioning it, and you're not really sure that it added the value that you wanted it to add to your life. An easy way to think about this is that just truly healthy and positive sexual experiences. They will feel positive and pleasurable at the moment, but then afterward, you're still going to continue to feel positive and that pleasure. The pleasure is still going to be an appealing thing even after the fact. Then also, a healthy and positive sexual experience is one that you always feel safe, understood, and valued. It's important that you understand not every sexual experience is going to be perfect.
There will be funny, awkward, and embarrassing times, but at no point should you ever not feel safe, understood, or valued, then; we have to nurture enriching relationships, so you feel safe, secure, and happy in your relationships. Romantic and otherwise that you have the social skills and competencies to build and sustain healthy relationships and then also just being in relationships that add value and meaning to your life and are truly a place of comfort and freedom and so you know building enriching relationships is not always easy but if we really focus on what adds value and meaning and purpose and where we find safety security and happiness and stick to those relationships that will help us nurture enriching relationships.
We have to exercise autonomy over your body and sex or sorry your sexuality and body, so this is having control in terms of how you express your sexuality being able to engage and not engage in sexual experiences of your choosing, and understanding consent. Consent is a critical part of sexual health, but it is much more complex than often taught. We're often taught that okay ask for consent and either grant or deny consent and then you're good to go but the problem is that consent requires a deep understanding of another person it requires a deep understanding of our self what we want and what we don't want it requires a confidence and comfort in expressing ourselves. It requires freedom to express ourselves. All these deep layers of consent make it incredibly complex and complicated and part of understanding or exercising autonomy over sex or sexuality.
The body understands how complex consent is and takes time to truly understand it and understand the people ourselves and the people we're engaging in sexual experiences with. We can always establish consent and then having access to the information services and products that empower a person to take ownership of family planning so that would be access to contraceptives and birth control and access to medical providers that can help and guide you through these different questions and connect you with services to get the right products.
You can have ownership of family planning then we have keeping the body free of infection and working at an optimal level so what this relates to is having access to the information services and products that prevent the spread of sexually transmitted infections so that would be having access to condoms having access to testing and having access to treatment.
If you do contract an STI and have the ability to navigate that situation in terms of interpersonal communication skills, then having a medically accurate understanding of sexual functioning and the sexual response. Understanding how the body actually works, not how it's prevent presented to work in media or pornography but how it actually works in real humans and understanding that humans are complex and everybody's different. People's bodies are going to respond and act in different ways. It's really important to understand what true medically accurate sexual functioning looks like and the sexual response. Understanding how an orgasm is and how a person achieves orgasm a medically accurate understanding of that you know what erections are? Understanding what the different body parts are? understanding of what sperm is and ejaculation and understanding of what arousal fluid is? All these different things are part of sexual functioning and the sexual response that we need to have a medical understanding of, not just assumptions based on what other people have told us or what we've seen in the media.
We have access to trusted medical providers to help you if your body isn't working at an optimal level, so as humans, we are sexual means, and our bodies are programmed to work in terms of sex and sexual functioning. The sexual response and that means that sex should be pleasurable, it should be fun, it should be connective, it should be a positive experience and if it's not some of that might be depends on who you're engaging with sexual experiences or who you're engaging in sexual experiences with but sometimes that can also mean that something is maybe not working the way it should in our body or it could mean that maybe we have an emotional or psychological situation that we need to work through.
Understanding that sex should be pleasurable, sex should be a positive thing, and then seeking help from a trusted medical provider if something isn't working the way it should. As you can see, true sexual health is multifaceted, and it's very complex, just like humans, so we must understand that to be sexually healthy. It's not going to be just a simple, quick fix; it's going to take intentional work related to each of those different elements of sexual health. Just some things to think about so to boost sexual health we need to intentionally strengthen each element of our sexual being as we boost total well-being it will also enhance sexual being and sexual well-being and vice versa so the more that we strengthen those pillars the more that our overall well-being will improve. Sexual health really plays a vital role in our overall well-being. Also, understand that sexual health relates to various life dimensions of health and health skills, and then always remember that humans are complex and complicated.
Sexual health is complex and complicated, and that's just because it's part of the human experience and what that means is that to be sexually healthy. It requires that you know thoughtful action, reflection and connection. Working on strengthening your various health skills and social skills, basically just understanding that sexual health is complex and complicated, and it's going to take work for you to establish an optimal level of sexual health in your life.
How do we strengthen sexual health? Well, just kind of the quick spark notes thoughtfully consider the different elements of sexual health and intentionally work to strengthen each element in your life and then also recommend just taking time to honor each of the different elements and not prioritizing over the other and just recognizing that sexual health is comprehensive and it relates to a variety of things
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One message that's just everyone deserves sexual health so no one should have to go through life without living an optimal level of sexual healt. It's important to understand that sexual health will look different for everybody because everyone's sexuality is different. It's unique, and what you want and need could be totally different from others, or even maybe you're a partner you're wit. Soo, it's just important to understand that everyone deserves sexual health, and this thing requires intentional work. Still, it's something that you all deserve and should take time to intentionally strengthen in your life.
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