Rape and s e x u a l assault can take many forms. Sometimes, it is a random occurrence between strangers, but it is actually more common for a woman to experience spousal rape, as statistics show that 51.1% of female rape victims are raped by an intimate partner.
So, what is marital rape? Learn the answer, as well as how to get help for yourself or a loved one, below.
What is marital rape?
Rape in marriage may seem like a strange concept, but the truth is that spousal rape does occur. In fact, prior to the 1970s, marital rape was not a criminal act in most states because spouses were exempt from s e x u a l assault laws.
As of today, spousal rape is a crime in all 50 states, but some have only outlawed this act relatively recently. For example, up until 1993, the law in North Carolina stipulated that a person could not be prosecuted for s e x u a l assault if the victim was the legal spouse of the perpetrator.
So, what is marital rape? It is just like any other type of rape, but it occurs within the context of a marriage. Marital rape occurs when one spouse forces the other to have lovemaking without consent.
A marital rape definition is as follows: Any act of unwanted intercourse or s e x u a l penetration that occurs with force, threats, or due to the victim’s incapacitation (such as being asleep or intoxicated).
In some states, marital s e x u a l assault is treated as a separate crime from s e x u a l assault that occurs outside of marriage. Perpetrators may receive lighter sentences for marital s e x u a l assault. For instance, in California, there is no mandatory prison sentence for someone who is convicted of committing rape in marriage.
Is spousal rape still considered rape?
woman laying on table It is not uncommon for people to ask, “Is it rape if you’re married?” Prior to the passage of laws that banned s e x u a l assault in a marriage, some people believed that spousal rape did not fit the criteria for rape. This is an egregious misconception.
The term “rape” refers to any instance in which one person forces another to have intercourse against their will.
If your spouse forces you to have intercoure or engage in a reproductive act that you do not consent to, it still counts as rape, even if you are married to the person. In fact, s e x u a l assault within a marriage is a form of intimate partner violence.
When people exchange marital vows, they promise to love, honor, and care for each other in times of sickness and health. They do not agree that one or both partners are entitled to intercourse when the other says no.
That being said, the answer to, “Can your husband rape you?” is a resounding yes. If a husband (or wife, for that matter) uses force to initiate intercourse or takes advantage of the other when they are incapacitated, this fits the criteria for rape.
Why do s e x u a l assault and marital rape happen?
After people find the answer to, “What is marital rape?” they often wonder why it happens. Rape in marriage is never the fault of the victim and is always because of the behavior of the perpetrator.
s e x u a l assault in marriage is about more than intercourse ; perpetrators of these acts desire to assert power, control, and dominance over their partners. They may also have unhealthy and adults beliefs surrounding marriage and partnership and feel as if they are entitled to the wife’s body whenever they desire it.
Furthermore, because of prevailing beliefs about the role of women in marriage, some people, including lawmakers, may believe that marriage means a woman has given irrevocable consent to having intercourse with her husband at any time and under any circumstances.
3 types of marital rape
When we define marital rape, it is important to understand that there can be several types of marital rape. Often, instances of spousal rape are divided into the following three categories:
1. Battering marital rape
This form of spousal rape includes both physical and s e x u a l violence. A victim is exposed not only to s e x u a l assault in marriage but also to instances of physical assault, including hitting, slapping, punching, and kicking.
In some cases, battering marital rape may occur only during lovemaking acts. For instance, a victim may be forced to have lovemaking, and during penetration, the perpetrator may physically beat the victim, leaving bruises or lacerations on the body.
In other instances, this type of marital rape can involve separate instances of physical and s e x u a l maltreatment .
A perpetrator may act out physically and then force the victim to have lovemaking in order to “make up” following a physical fight. Or physical and s e x u a l maltreatment can occur separately in the context of a marriage that includes ongoing acts of domestic violence.
2. Force-only spousal rape
With force-only marital s e x u a l maltreatment, there is no physical violence that occurs separately from rape. A husband uses only the amount of physical force necessary to coerce his wife into having lovemaking.
For example, a husband using force-only rape may hold his partner down and force s e x u a l intercourse upon her, or he may threaten to harm her if she does not give in and have intercourse. Outside of these acts of s e x u a l violence, there is no ongoing physical battering.
A perpetrator who engages in force-only rape may force a victim to have intercourse through incapacitation. The perpetrator may drug the victim or force large quantities of alcohol upon the victim, so they are not able to resist the perpetrator’s s e x u a l penetration.
In some cases, the victim may be so incapacitated that they are not aware they are being subjected to marital rape.
3. Obsessive marital rape
Obsessive marital rape, also called sadistic rape, involves extreme and perverse lovemaking acts committed against the other spouse’s will. Instances of spousal rape that fall under this category can include torturous acts that place the victim at risk of harm and violate the victim’s dignity and rights as a human being.
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