In an interesting position, a woman is most worried about the state of the baby - is everything good with him? Is it developing correctly? Ultrasound, screenings, visits to the doctor, the choice of a maternity hospital and a pediatrician, finally! In this hustle and bustle, we are missing some less obvious, but no less important things.
1. Desire to divorce:
Pregnancy is a time of change. On the one hand, a woman's body is changing, turning into a forty-week work with an increased load without holidays and days off. On the other hand, habits, interests, and character are changing - far from always behind these metamorphoses only hormonal storms lie, one should not forget about psychological adaptation to an “interesting situation”. Pregnant whims are often nothing more than a test for the future father: is it possible to rely on him, to entrust in the future the care of the dearest one - about the child?
Correction of mistakes: it is not at all necessary to keep the "striped" test for all nine months (one or even both strips may disappear), but write a memo immediately after confirming pregnancy with the following content "I will not get divorced until at least I will give birth ”- it is possible and necessary. And not just write, but look into it from time to time in order to cope with “emotional impulses”.
2. Full concentration on the child:
“We ate, we slept, we ...” - whatever you like, “we” is a typical speech pattern of young mothers, clearly demonstrating the fact that although the umbilical cord was cut, the emotional connection between mother and child remained intact ... Its presence gives the initially helpless baby every chance to survive. But ask yourself - who are we? Is dad included in your relationship with your child? Alas, the answer is likely to be negative.
Work on mistakes: do not forget to involve the young father in caring for the baby (games, massage, bathing, walks, etc.), he will cope! And how easy it is for you to cope with the child if dad leaves the family, feeling like a third extra is a big question ...
3. Striving to be the perfect mother:
The attitude “Well, I’m a mother, I must give my child all the best” is fraught with a constant feeling of guilt. For what? Yes, for anything - for a mother who continuously worries about how good she is, it is as easy as shelling pears to summon him. However, if people around do not find suitable excuses, my mother ... will "invent" them for herself.
Correction of mistakes: you have the right to make mistakes, to be sure of this, read at your leisure the works of the classic - recognized luminary of pediatrics and psychotherapy Donalds Woods Winnicott. Winnicott is confident that a child does not need a perfect mom! He even coined a special term "Good enough mother" - the one who is in contact with her child, with his needs, with his needs.
4. Fatalism:
“Will the kilograms gained during pregnancy stay with me? Of course, after all, both grandmother and mother never managed to lose weight after giving birth. Will I have stretch marks? Yes, there is no need to guess - their appearance is due to genetics. You shouldn't even try to do anything. Heavy legs? It makes no sense to fight it, however, as well as with constipation or the appearance of hemorrhoids "- decadent internal monologues are very dangerous. Sometimes it is much easier to wave a hand at yourself than to adhere to simple rules that facilitate the usual course of pregnancy.
Correcting mistakes: first, ask yourself - who told you that everything will certainly be so? Second, ponder at your leisure, why do you need beliefs that limit your options? Third, take action! Good habits - walking a lot, eating green vegetables and fruits regularly, drinking at least 8 glasses of water a day, taking a contrast shower, doing self-massage, pampering the skin with moisturizers - will help maintain beauty and health during pregnancy and after childbirth.
5. Unwillingness to discuss sensitive topics with the doctor:
“Well, how can it be! How can you “talk about it” with a doctor! No way!" - among the topics that cause such a reaction is, first of all, such an intimate disease as hemorrhoids.
Correction of errors: try to look at this problem not “from the inside” (ashamed, uncomfortable, oh, what will they think of me), but as if from the outside.
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