"How do you know if you have met the right one?"
Almost everyone asks this question at some point in his or her life; Unfortunately, not many people get a concrete answer. But if you read this article, you are one of the lucky ones.
Interestingly, the methods of choosing a mate can be reduced to just four main factors. If you can find someone with all four you are more likely to find your life partner.
1) What Are the Main Principles of This Person?
Before you decide to marry, make sure that you are fully committed to a purposeful life. Whether we realize it or not, everyone has some kind of value that is at the core of his or her personality. And when the push comes to push, that number will be the most important thing in the world for that person.
Example: Jerry's value is self-sacrifice. When Jerry first fell in love with Diana, he happened to be a volunteer at the local Emergency Room. He goes there every night, holding the hands of the people, and silencing them. And Diana thinks Jerry should have a heart of gold if this is how he spends his free time. Now, it is possible that Jerry has a truly golden heart. But he is volunteering for his love of adventure. The ER is full of action, it's fun. So now, Jerry's elegance manifests itself in a kind way. But that can change. Jerry may stop volunteering, and start trying other adventures Diana might find unpleasant, dangerous, or inappropriate.
However, if Jerry's main concern is a commitment to beauty and care, then everything he does will revolve around that, including his marriage. And Diana will be a lucky woman if she marries him.
So how do you know who the real Jerry is? Surprisingly, it is not that difficult. No matter what the basic value of a person, you will see him give up on it every day. If Jerry's worth is self-sacrificing, he could risk an accident to cross a street or be late for work because he had to chase after the police. If Diana follows him closely, you will see that he puts the journey above other priorities in his list of priorities. But if Jerry's importance is good, then Diana will see him give up certain things in order to be kind. If the waiter mixes his order, he will say thank you and eat dinner anyway. He will let another young man cross the intersection first, or he may be late for work because he has called an old woman who is going home with her groceries. If Diana follows him closely, he will see her release some of her desires to take care of other people.
So look for someone who is committed to the core of the highest set of values you can value.
2) Is This Person Good for Others?
The second number is obvious: You want to marry someone who will take care of you and treat you well. How can you find it? It's easy. Spend time with this person, and pay attention to how they treat others who really do not care because he or she is not trying to seduce them. Do they thank the watchman who pumped their gas? Do they have respect for people at the payment counters? Do they insult people who are not punctual, such as telephone operators or overtime waiters? Do they often drive violently, as if no one else was on the road?
Ask yourself questions like these and note the answers - because they indicate the features that will come out of the line. Many people are so careful that they do not even think about how they treat others. So look at them, and you will know how they will treat you after marriage.
3) Do We Communicate Well With Others?
In other words, make sure you understand each other. This may seem obvious, but it is not.
Sometimes you can see a couple fighting and arguing for an hour, two hours, maybe all night. And then, at the end of the 16th round, it turned out that the whole thing was a misunderstanding: “Oh, I thought you understood that ... wasn't that what you meant? Oh, and then we agree. ”
Although this can sometimes happen to anyone, if it does happen it is not always a good sign because that may not change. If you do not always understand, then you may want to terminate the relationship for a while.
4) Are We Attractive?
Physical attraction is a vital part of a marriage. You cannot marry someone if you are not physically attractive to him. And while men reach this conclusion somewhat faster, women should give themselves more time. Usually, a woman may not feel attracted to a man at first, but after getting to know him, she finds him more attractive than before.
Caution: While physical attraction is important, you cannot support marriage in a physical sense. Anything that happens physically is meant to be a reflection of something deeper that happens at the emotional and spiritual level. The rule is - make sure physical attraction is present, but do not be overwhelmed by it. The other three factors are equally important, if not more so.
So you have it. Next time you are dating, apply what you learn here. It will save you a lot of time and heartache, and you may find yourself going faster than you think.
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