What is Triangulation in relationships?
Some individuals might use triangulation in relationships to control or influence their partners. The manipulator or triangulator brings a third party into a relationship mix so that they can take their side. Unfortunately, this leaves the other partner defenseless since they have no one to support them.
When someone in a relationship experiences triangulation, they may begin to worry about what people think. Therefore, they may begin to feel defensive, ashamed, or humiliated.
Some might even feel pressured to explain themselves to others, which may turn out poorly for them.
The perpetrator usually knows you may act out of fear to set the record straight. So, they could be patient for you to commit an error, so they can leverage that to prove their point.
To learn more about Triangulation in Relationships and how narcissists use it to their advantage, check out this research study by Nicholas J.S. Day and other authors. This study is titled Living with Pathological narcissism: a qualitative study. It is a robust research into the personality trait of narcissists.
Some examples of Triangulation,,,
Old woman scolding young lady
It is not enough to recognize the signs of triangulation in relationships; learning how they can show up is important.
You might face a case of toxic triangulation, and knowing how to find your way out is crucial.
Here are some examples of triangulation maltreatmen in different types of relationships.
1. Parents and children
If a narcissistic parent has children, you can easily detect when a triangulation relationship is in play.
For example, a narcissistic parent might employ strategies to put the child in a situation where they have to choose between both parents.
The other parent might get frustrated and quit the relationship. Also, the narcissistic parent can apply emotional triangulation to buy the child’s love.
For instance, they can permit the child to do things the other parent has abhorred. When this happens repeatedly, the child will be drawn to the parent that permits them to do what they want.
In a single-parent setting, the narcissistic parent can also make the child or children believe that the partner who left is at fault. Overall, the goal of the manipulative parent is to create an atmosphere in the home where they are in control and never at fault.
2. Romantic relationships
Narcissists often use triangulation in relationships to exert control over their partners. It is quite uncommon to see narcissists use physical means of adult or violence because they want their partner to do their bidding.
Rather, they revert to manipulative means like triangulation, gaslighting, etc., to put their partner in check.
For instance, they can tell their partner that their ex is trying to get back with them. Then, they try to use this information to their advantage for their partner to get scared that they might lose them probably.
Also, a triangulation narcissist might be smart not to compare their partners with their ex to avoid conflicts directly. However, they will pass some comments that motivate their partners to work harder and perform better than their ex.
If there is conflict in the relationship, the emotionally abusive partner will try to invite a third party and make them take their sides. So, even if their partner were not wrong, they would have to apologize for peace to reign and to protect their good name.
3. In friendships
Triangulation in friendships is quite similar to what happens in romantic relationships. If there are a group of friends, the narcissist or manipulator may try to get everyone on their side for maximum support when there is a conflict.
When they are not on good terms with someone, they may talk about them behind their backs to gain the needed alliance.
Triangulation in relationships like friendships is often exploited to create rivalry among people. So, instead of directly communicating with someone, they will bring in a third party and force them to take their side.
To Be Continue Next Part -3
You must be logged in to post a comment.