🤣😂🤣😂
One morning a woman was walking out of her front door, when she notices a strange little man at the bottom of her garden.
“You’re a goblin,” she says, “I caught you and you owe me three wishes!”
So the goblin replies “OK, you caught me fair and square, what’s your first wish?”
The woman stops and thinks for a second, “I want a huge mansion to live in.”, goblins replies “OK, you’ve got it.”
Woman again thinks it over, “My second wish is a Mercedes.” “OK, you’ve got that too.”
“My last wish is a million dollars!”. The goblin then says “OK, you’ve got it. But to make your wishes come true you have to have to make love to me all night.”
She replies, “OK then, if that’s what it takes…”
Next morning the little man wakes the woman up.
“Tell me,” says the man, “how old are you?” “I’m 27″, she replies
“Isn’t that something”, says the man, “27 and you still believe in goblins?”
Second Joke .....
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I checked into a hotel on a business trip and was a bit lonely (and horny) so I thought I'd get me one of those male escorts you see advertised in phone booths when you're calling for a cab.
I had grabbed a card on my way into the hotel. It was an Ad for a guy calling himself Ben Dover; a lovely fit bloke, had all the right muscles in all the right places.... and a killer smile..... So I'm in my room and figure, what the hell, I'll give him a call.
"Hello?" the guy says. God, she is very beautiful
"Hi, I hear you give a great massage and I'd like you to come to my room and give me one. No, wait, I should be straight with you. I'm in town all alone and what I really want is s**. I want it hard, I want it hot, and I want it now. I'm talking kinky the whole night long. You name it, we'll do it. Bring all your implements, toys, everything you've got in your bag of tricks.We'll go hot and heavy all night Tie me up, cover me in chocolate syrup and whip cream, anything you want. Now, how does that sound?"
He says, "That sounds fantastic, but for an outside line you need to press 9."
❤️❤️ End ❤️❤️
Old and still lit 🤣🤣
An elderly woman was walking her dog one evening when a young man ran by her and grabbed her purse and took off, a couple across the street ran over to check on her saying the police were called and would be here in a few minutes, the woman smiles and tells the couple that its really no big deal,she carries her old purse to put her dog's poop in it until she gets home to dispose it..imagine the surprise when the thief opens the purse🤪
😂🤣😂
A farmer had 5 female pigs. Times were hard, so he decided to take them to the county fair and sell
them.
At the fair, he met another farmer who owned five male pigs.
After talking a bit, they decided to mate the pigs and split everything 50/50.
The farmers lived sixty miles apart, so they agreed to drive thirty miles each and find a field in which to let the pigs mate.
The first morning, the farmer with the female pigs got up at 5 A.M., loaded the pigs into the family station wagon, (which was the only vehicle he had) and drove the thirty miles.
While the pigs were mating, he asked the other farmer, "How will I know if they are pregnant?"
The other farmer replied, "If they're lying in the grass tomorrow morning, They're pregnant. If they're in the mud, they're not."
The next morning the pigs were rolling in the mud, so he hosed them off, loaded them into the family station wagon again and proceeded to try again.
This continued each morning for more than a week and both farmers were worn out.
The next morning he was too tired to get out of bed.
He called to his wife, "Honey, please look outside and tell me whether the pigs are in the mud or in the grass."
"Neither," yelled his wife, "they're in the station wagon and one of them is honking the horn."
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