Dr. Saddington said this is referred to as “chem s e x ”:
“[Q]uite often it’s associated with cocaine or ketamine, [w]here they’re feeling that by taking [Viagra], it’s enhancing their intercourse experience. So the intercourse experience that they’re looking for is associated with drug taking as well. So, it becomes a very recognized pattern that they’re getting into.”
He said he’ll often see or hear men having a weekend of taking many of these drugs and being intercourse with either the same person or many people.
Casual s e x and Viagra
Dr. Saddington said it was more common for young men to take Viagra for casual intercourse encounters rather than long-term committed relationships.
“It’s quite often associated with the idea that in a relationship where they’ve got a commitment, and they’re feeling more confident, they don’t worry so much about performance, the erection becomes much more sustainable,” he said.
R said he thought it was this very “nature of being in a more casual thing with people” that made it hard to maintain an erection.
“[Because it was casual], if I did have a problem, then I wouldn’t be able to negotiate [or] say, ‘well, today’s not the day, let’s do something else’. Those options and avenues didn’t feel like they were open to me,” he said, highlighting the lack of communication and openness in that relationship dynamic.
“[Having a harder time having and keeping an erection is] a natural thing that happens when [a] relationship breaks up, or [they’re] trying to have more casual relationships or start a relationship, performance anxiety starts creeping— the urgency, a sense that they will be judged or blamed if they don’t get an erection.”
Communication can solve many problems
Dr. Ratush likened Viagra to workout supplements and said that men, in general, were open to trying such things. However, such a pharmaceutical solution, he said, has made people push the root causes under the carpet.
“The unfortunate part is that people moved away from actual ‘talk therapy’ as a way of addressing their intercourse issues,” he said.
“[I]f there was communication with [their] partner, the fear about performance anxiety might not be there. So, before [taking] a medication like this, therapists [sh]ould be working with men and their partners to create a way of communicating to one another so that they could feel as comfortable as possible in their lovemaking.”
— Dr. Edward Ratush
Dr. Ratush said that not talking and being transparent with a partner can have a wider negative impact on psycho intercourse well-being and increase dependency on medications such as Viagra.
“In a way, what’s happening over time is we create a bigger and bigger rift between men and their partners about the communication involved in this dynamic,” he said.
R agreed. He said taking Viagra wasn’t a cure for his anxiety about keeping an erection.
“[I] got into a long-term relationship with someone at the beginning of this year. And being in that relationship enables me to negotiate actually, if I don’t feel like it’s going to be the day for performance, then the are other options available to us that result in still having a good time,” he said.
“[Many people] struggle to share what they’re really experiencing or talking about if they’ve got problems, how to resolve them intercourse . I think there’s a taboo about being able to talk about s e x and to explain how to get your needs met or how to talk about things if they’re going wrong. That’s why therapy can be so effective because it allows them the chance to talk about it.”
— Dr. Peter Saddington
Erections and men’s self-perception
The pressure to perform and the lack of communication risks creating bigger relationship problems.
“What it tells me most is that there’s a big divide amongst hetero intercourse couples, between men and women in what they understand about one another. [B]ecause clearly, there’s much that men can still learn about themselves intercourse , and how they function and how to optimize their own physiology and functionality,” said Dr. Ratush.
“[The] idea that not only do I have to understand myself, but then translate it to someone who doesn’t have similar parts, and similar experiences, is, I think, a really daunting task,” he said, adding that some men do not even want to be seen by their partners when they are flaccid.
“[They like to only enter the arena when they’re fully ready for performance, so to speak,” he said.
“[For men] it’s so much easier to just perform well than to be able to explain why something that is happening is contributing to your anxiety. Because one of the things that Viagra and Cialis do beyond erectile functionality is they impact things like early ejaculation problems as well. So there’s more to it than just the erections.”
— Dr. Edward Ratush
Behind younger adults seeking to use Viagra, according to our experts, could also be social media and adult as influencing factors. However, it all boils down to s e x education.
‘[I]’d certainly say that for a lot of young men, their s e x education comes from adult . So if it’s based on seeing men, [that] are performing in a very virile way, [that] appear to be able to have s e x when they want to, in whatever position [f]or a long period of time, [and] if they’re judging themselves against that, they’re not going to be able to behave or act intercourse in the same way. So there’s going to be a lot of anxiety about [that],” said Dr. Saddington.
End the Part....
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