Mother and daughter talking
You see your teen making googly eyes at their date, and you see your date looking just as engrossed in your kid. It's time for 'the talk.' You know what we are getting at here. Even if you have laid out the biological birds and bees facts and touched on how that applies to adult interactions, you will probably want to have the talk again. All that verbiage before teenage dating was abstract, something to ponder in the far-off future. Judging from the lovebirds in your living room, however, the distant future has turned into right now, and refresher courses are imperative.
The Birds, the Bees, and Consent
Parents approach the birds and bees talk from different angles, and these talks are often based on a family's morals and values. Go ahead and tackle it any way you choose, but keep in mind that if your teen is dating and romantically interested in another person, you should at least lay down the facts of life so they have all the information to make responsible and safe choices when outside of your care.
Furthermore, the concept of consent needs to be discussed. Should your teens take their romantic interest to an adult level physically, you will want your kid to be crystal clear on what consent is, why it is essential, and how consent isn't a one-time thing. Encourage them to ask questions regarding this new phase of life, and questions about consent (since this is something that is likely a bit new and foreign to them). Lay out scenarios, discuss hypotheticals, be honest and approachable with this subject matter, and know that no matter how uncomfortable the talk is, it's all part of this parenting gig, and it needs to be had.
One Talk Is NOT Enough
You got through "the talk." Phew. Glad that is over and done with!
It's not over and done with, not by a long shot. When it comes to teens, dating, and romantic interests, the talk needs to be revisited from time to time to time again. Check in with your kid as they move through the dating experience. They will probably come up with new questions as new situations reveal themselves. Keep the lines of communication wide open, because you want your teen coming to you for answers to their burning, hormonal questions, not gathering ideas and info from their favorite television series characters, friends, or social media.
Listen Between the Lines
When discussing anything dating or consent-related, listen to your child, like really listen. Teens are not always stellar at saying what they are thinking or asking what they need to. Read between the lines and be sure you are hearing all they are saying, but also, and more importantly, pick up on what they are not saying.
Dangers of Teen Dating
The dating scene isn't without dangers, especially pertaining to teens, who are often new to this arena. These days, modern technology, social media, texting, and apps must be addressed in the teen dating experience.
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