What does inner peace mean to you? Does it mean a haven where you can come home from stressful situations and find that place of safety away from the "cares of the world"? Does it mean a place where you can be yourself without the facade that many of us wear all day long, so people won't know how we really feel? Or is this place (often our home) another place where we have to fend off the constant onslaught of anger, hostility, and power plays that so often characterize our lives in the 21st century?
The dictionary defines internal as: relating to or located within the body; relating to or existing in the mind. Peace is defined as: a state of calm and quiet; freedom from distracting thoughts; and an agreement on the cessation of hostilities. For the purposes of this article, I will combine the two concepts and define inner peace as: the integration of our thoughts and feelings culminating in a state of calm and harmony. One of the most important keys to this peace and harmony, or "peace of mind" as it is often called, is to honor our emotional nature and find ways to express feelings in appropriate ways that allow us to release them.
Practical steps to release emotions
1. Learn to listen to yourself. Many of us have been afflicted for so long that we are completely out of touch with how we feel. A situation arises and we 'turn around' and find it unbelievable that we have lost control. This actually results from the accumulation of emotions that we were not aware of.
2. Take responsibility for your feelings. No one can make you feel anything; rather, you choose how you think and feel based on how you interpret the situation. Blaming others betrays your power, and when you feel like a "victim" you react with anger and resentment.
3. Talk to a trusted friend or counselor. Finding a "safe place" where you can express your feelings without being judged provides an opportunity to release pent-up emotions.
4. Accept yourself. You are not supposed to be perfect, and learning to accept yourself with all your strengths and weaknesses creates feelings of peace within.
5. Don't judge yourself. Judging yourself means thinking you have to be perfect and creates feelings of not being 'good enough'. When you feel inadequate, you judge yourself harshly and no matter what you do, it will never be 'good enough'.
6. Let go of the past. The past is gone, and you did the best you could with what you knew at the time. If your past brings up memories of painful experiences, release the memories and find forgiveness for yourself and/or others. This does not mean that you condone this behavior. It means releasing memories and feelings to find your own inner healing and peace.
7. Learn to relax. There are many methods that contribute to maintaining balance and harmony. Practicing meditation as a daily ritual, reading, exercising, going for a walk, or creating a sacred space where you can spend time feeling renewed and refreshed are all methods to shift your focus from focusing on what is wrong to seeing yourself like "taking control of your life."
8. Practice gratitude. What you pay attention to increases when you give energy to your thoughts. Thoughts of peace, love and abundance increase inner healing and peace and lead to a life that feels more balanced and harmonious.
9. Keep a journal. People have used journaling for many years to release emotions and make sense of what is happening. This diary or notebook is for your eyes only and allows you to say whatever you want without anyone but you seeing it. Once expressed, emotions tend to dissipate, and you will find them released by this exploration. If this process does not completely relax them the first time, repeat the exercise.
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