7 Tips for How to Make Great Conversation

How to make great conversation? It’s easy if you know what to say and when to say it! These seven tips will help you keep the conversation going smoothly and help you make new friends wherever you go.

1. Make Eye Contact,

listening is an integral part of making great conversation. But you can’t listen well if you’re not looking at the person who’s speaking. Whether you’re a good listener or not, eye contact is still important; it tells your conversational partner that they have your attention and that they matter.

When speaking, make sure to maintain eye contact with your listener(s). If multiple people are participating in a conversation, stay on top of who you’re focusing on at any given time.

For those times when it’s hard to look someone in the eyes during a serious discussion, try focusing your gaze on their upper torso — just be sure not to stare so intently that it makes them uncomfortable!

Making eye contact is an effective way to convey interest in what someone has to say. It’s also a great way to gauge how well you’re being understood. It can feel a little awkward at first, but if you can muster up enough courage, make sure that your eyes don’t stray too much from their gaze.

A good rule of thumb is to hold eye contact between 15 and 20 seconds — long enough for your point across and elicit a response from your partner in conversation.

Making eye contact is important in any interaction, but it’s especially crucial during a conversation. Making eye contact is one of those things we’re all taught from an early age, but how many of us actually listen?

This simple tip can be difficult to execute at first because it feels unnatural and perhaps even a little forced. However, if you want to build great conversations that lead to long-lasting connections and professional relationships, maintaining eye contact is crucial.

2. Listen More Than You Talk,

Most people love talking about themselves and what they know best. So as long as you’re giving your conversation partner plenty of opportunities to talk, you can hold back on making too many personal disclosures.

(This tip is useful in job interviews and professional networking situations, where revealing information about yourself before your audience has even met you might come across as disingenuous.)

But don’t forget: Your goal is to find out about your conversation partner, not vice versa. So keep questions coming — most people appreciate being listened to — and lean forward attentively. That way, when it comes time for her or him to talk, they will! Just listen more than you talk! Good luck!

Most people don’t listen actively. They will hear you, but their mind is only partially engaged, and their thoughts are drifting off somewhere else. So, learn how to truly listen in conversation.

Don’t be so eager to speak next that you stop paying attention once it’s your turn again. This tip sounds simple, but even professional salespeople make mistakes with it.

When you’re talking, you’re doing more than communicating — you’re also listening. Listening is a skill that is easier said than done, and one that needs constant practice. It can be tricky to strike a balance between speaking and listening, but actively make an effort to listen more than you speak.

3. To have an Interesting Topic in Hand,

Most people don’t go out of their way to make small talk because they don’t want to feel like they’re wasting time. If you want to get better at having great conversations, consider what you can bring that other people will find interesting.

Whether it’s cooking tips, design inspiration or a new book — or even a joke — you should have something in your back pocket. This will help others connect with you and make conversation easier.

For example, if someone mentions trying a new restaurant, ask where she went and what she thought about it. This is a conversation, so let’s talk about something interesting. Have an interesting topic in hand when you go into it. This is not just a casual meetup.

But an opportunity to get to know someone well — talk about his or her interests and your interests, and have a little fun with it. It doesn’t have to be deep philosophy; just make sure you don’t end up talking about traffic or which restaurants are best in town. You can have that kind of talk another time.

The most basic guideline in how to make a great conversation is to have an interesting topic on hand — and, even better, two or three. Having more than one conversation topic will help keep your discussion fresh as you and your friend/lover/acquaintance/person-on-the-street travel through a series of topics.

Think about what kinds of things interest you and what might interest your conversation partner; that way, you are each be able to contribute meaningfully when it’s your turn.

4. Ask Questions That Get Them Talking

It’s far easier to make someone laugh when you have something interesting to say. The easiest way is by listening, and asking them questions about themselves will help you get a sense of what makes them tick.

If you want to see an instant smile on their face, ask them how they got started with their career or how they meet their friends. People love talking about themselves, so it won’t be hard work at all!

Start a conversation by asking an open-ended question — an easy way to get them talking. A simple, So, what’s up? It is not going to cut it; you need something that will get them opening up and sharing details about their life.

Pick your topic: Talk about their interests or hobbies. People love talking about themselves, so pick topics that relate to their interests. There’s an art and a science to the conversation, whether you’re chatting with friends or colleagues.

If you have the know-how, it can be incredibly rewarding, both personally and professionally. There are few things as powerful in life as making connections with people and truly understanding them.

Pay attention to what they’re saying and actively listen so that you don’t appear distracted or simply fish for your next turn at talk time.

5. People Love Compliments,

Compliments make people feel good, and making someone feel good is a great way to start a conversation. The next time you’re at an event where you don’t know anyone, try telling someone how much you like something about them — their dress, watch, jacket, or hair.

You can also complement their kids on their manners or even their babysitter’s taste in music. Before long, you’ll be chatting away! Compliments make people feel good, and they’re a great way to break through an awkward silence.

Compliment something unusual — like someone’s shoes or a nice pen they have on their desk — to get your conversational partner talking about something that interests them. Bonus points if you can follow up with more questions about their passions.

Compliments are always a great icebreaker, but try not to default to them too often. You want to avoid seeming like you’re fishing for compliments (although if you do get one, that’s okay too — it means you were probably giving off positive vibes). When complimenting someone, it’s best not to lead with it.

6. Don’t Try to Impress, but Show Interest

The best way to make a great conversation is by showing genuine interest in what your partner is saying. Ask questions, and listen carefully when they answer. It’s amazing how far simple questions go, especially if you don’t add, huh? Or okay… at the end of them.

If you aren’t interested in what someone has to say, at least have enough respect for them to fake it. Many people try too hard to impress new acquaintances.

Instead, you want to focus on a genuine interest in others. Try asking questions that make people feel good about themselves, rather than focus on your own background and accomplishments. The more they like you, the more likely they’ll like you again.

Don’t try to show off, just be interested in who you’re talking with. Ask about their interests and allow them to do most of the talking.

Most people will open up when you ask them questions and make it clear that you want to hear what they have to say. People love that! It helps turn a stranger into a friend fast.

7. People Like Being Laughed At!

Laughter is a powerful and universal connector. Your body releases endorphins when you laugh, which leave you feeling relaxed and happy. Plus, laughter is contagious, so it’s a great way to help strangers connect with each other. Looking for someone to talk to on a flight?

Try striking up a conversation with your fellow passengers by telling an amusing story about your travels. No one minds a little small talk during takeoff! And best of all: people love being laughed at! If you can make them smile.

They’ll start reciprocating — and pretty soon you’ve got yourself a long-lasting connection and new friend. We’re all looking for a little positivity in our lives, so make sure you give someone a reason to smile — even if that means making fun of yourself.

The right humor can make your companion feel good and put you in their good graces. It can also get a conversation flowing when things start getting stilted.

It’s hard not to have a good time when you’re talking with someone who can crack a joke. It helps create that I can’t believe I’m laughing right now!

But, it feels so good! Sensation. If you want people to love being around you, learn how to make them laugh without sacrificing your own wit and charm.